Dating straight women
"[He set] the boundaries enough to let me think, hope, there's a chance, it just needs time; but there was always that nagging feeling, the dread, that it could end." Inevitably, the pressure got too much.“He had enough and couldn't deal with it any more, so he retreated to his heteronormative lifestyle."Although the gay guy in the relationship will try their best to be sympathetic – they know this struggle better than most, after all – it's understandable that their patience will wear thin.Gay men aren't toys to be practised on." It’s only in the last year Simon has managed to start dating again.
The gay half of this relationship can find that despite being in control of his own sexuality, he has zero steer on the relationship – everything that happens is ruled by the straight half’s desire to either keep it a secret or leave it undefined.
PDAs, future plans, relationships with families – if it’s on the downlow, it's little more than an affair, which can have a huge effect on the guy who wants to be open.
James identifies as gay, but his first proper relationship was with a man who did not.
"It's crushing during the relationship and after," he says.
Says Robin: “I thought he was going to have a heart attack.